“People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don’t believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can’t find them, make them.” ― George Bernard Shaw, Mrs. Warren’s Profession
With mental illness, it is difficult to be positive. Like, really REALLY difficult. It brings you down and can do a lot of hurtful things to you, My experience has positive and negative qualities.
When I was 14, I went to my first psychiatric hospital. It was difficult, and I stayed much longer than the typical stay. Even though I was going through medicines like crazy and mood swings left and right,I tried to find something to calm myself. Drawing dresses was that something. I would get huge pieces of paper and just draw dresses for hours. There are different lengths, colors, sleeve, and so much more you can change. It is so soothing to just sit there and think of a design.
At age 16, I was in a residential treatment center. I was having the toughest time of my life. Self-harm, hallucinations, and mood swings were haunting me. You know what I did? I wrote poetry. I wrote SO many poems during those nine months. I only wish that I could find them.
Now I am 19. I am still struggling, but blogger helps that. Getting to share my thoughts and advocate for others makes me stay strong. My medicines might not be right still, no treatment might be working, but I know I am going to find my way through.
There are so many things that I can do instead of being negative. Having Asperger’s (now called Autism Level 1) and bipolar is not easy. It is the most difficult thing I have ever dealt with. Have I had my negative times? Oh yeah. Way too many of them. However, I am learning how to stay in a positive state of mind, Whether it be my blogging, drawing, writing poetry, listening to music, or whatever I choose to do, I will beat this, because with every problem, there is a recovery at the end.